“My philosophy
like colour TV
is all there
in black and white”
Monty Python

Quotes, Aphorisms, Laws, and Thoughts
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 A camel is a horse designed by a committee. 
 A radioactive cat has eighteen half-lives. 
 A woman who takes her husband about with her everywhere is like a cat that goes on playing with a mouse long after she's killed it. 
 Cows are vegetarian so you don't have to be. 
 Dublin is a city where you can see a sparrow fall to the ground, and God watching it. 
 Fish die belly-upward and rise to the surface; it is their way of falling. 
 Horse sense is what stops horses from betting on humans. 
 Horsepower was a wonderful thing when only horses had it. 
 I like pigs: dogs look up to us; cats look down on us; pigs treat us as equals. 
 I like sadism, necrophilia, and zoophilia. Am I flogging a dead horse? 
 If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have on your hands is a nonworking cat. 
 Life is like a dog sled team: if you're not the lead dog, the scenery never changes. 
 Man is a dog's idea of what God should be. 
 Mickey Mouse is a rat. 
 No horse goes as fast as the money you bet on him. 
 One way to stop a runaway horse is to bet on him. 
 Only dead fish swim with the stream. 
 People who keep dogs are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves. 
 Sacred cows make the best hamburger. 
 The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. 
 The goal of science is to build better mousetraps. The goal of nature is to build better mice. 
 The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets. 
 The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.