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My philosophy
like colour TV
is all there
in black and white
Monty Python
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66Statistics99

A statistician can have his head in an oven and his feet in ice, and he will say that on the average he feels fine.
Anonymous

A statistician is a person who draws a mathematically precise line from an unwarranted assumption to a foregone conclusion.
Anonymous

Eighty percent of all people consider themselves to be above average drivers.
Anonymous

Half the people in the world are below average.
Anonymous

He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp posts: for support rather than illumination.
Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

Numbers are like people; torture them enough and they'll tell you anything.
Anonymous

Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive, what they conceal is vital.
Aaron Levenstein (1911-1986)

The Lottery is a tax on people who don't understand statistics.
Anonymous

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damn lies and statistics.
Leonard Courtney (1832-1918)

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